A legacy of faith

Rusula Adikoila Cavalevu

Hi YFI and readers of this blog, first off I want to say that I am encouraged and excited by those of you who already wrote amazing stories in this platform. It is a great source of inspiration to all of us.

I wanted to share a brief story that touched my heart during this pandemic. It is about a 70 year old woman. The woman and her daughter moved into a flat beside mine last month. The daughter works as a security officer and her mother most of the time stayed home by herself.

Last two weeks in the middle of the night, I heard moaning and I thought that I had a bad dream, but No! It's the lady next door calling for help with emotional soft voice, "Lewa kere veivuke". 

I ran out and heard that it was her. I opened the door and saw her lying on the floor. She called to me, “Lewa please help me.”

I moved the wheelchair and lifted her and got her from the room to their sitting room. I asked her what she wanted. She said she fell off her bed as she tried to take her tablet which she coudn't reach.

“Am in pain lewa,” she said.

I asked, “Where's your daughter?”

“She sent me a message that she slept over at her friend's place and will come home after her shift 12 o'clock tomorrow.”

I was thinking that if she's my mother I will not leave her like that. I can see the pain she's been through seeing her swollen leg and severe headache.

After she took her tablet she asked me if I can come and help her get to the shower the next day as she feels weak.

I agreed telling her, “If you need anything just call me on my phone. I will see you tomorrow morning and before I go, please can i pray for us?”  

She said yes.

After the prayer I say goodbye and came back home.

Next morning after my devotion I prepared pancakes with jam and took it to her.

When I called her aunty she responded that she woke up already.

I boiled the hot water and took it to her bathroom, After her shower, we sat in the couch in the living room and I changed her dressing on her wound.

I prepared her breakfast by 9 o'clock and we chatted until 11am.

She shared that she was so thankful that I was there when she needed help.

Her daughter came about 12:15pm and  she saw her sitting in the living room watching TV looking happy. She came to me thanking me for what i did when she's not around and I told her, “You have to remember they will leave us one day while we still have the chance to see them, we give them our best protection, stay beside them in moments of suffering, loving and caring for them as they are our source of blessing.”

From that day till today she came back home straight after work and she really changed the way she treats her mom.

In closing, we will be rewarded for every good deed, for every person we encourage, for every act of kindness.

We are building a legacy of faith.

!!Thanks!!

My spiritual journey..God is Good and He is Always There for Us..

 Sefanaia Kau bares his soul and testifies to the goodness of the Risen Christ…

Sefa (3rd from r-back) is pictured with YFIs

When I was younger, I was a promising young soul to my family, as I was good both in academic work and in athletics. Everything was a smooth sail till I reached high school

My years in high school was filled with new things I has never experienced, take it from someone who went to a primary school – 5 mins drive away from his house. The temptations and excitement of this new world was a lot for me to handle and it kind of ruined me, not blaming people around me but the lack of strength and power to take control of my life made it as so, I flowed with any wave that swept my way, I did drugs at a young age, had my first drink at the age 14, for my age group back then it was a big achievement that deserves a medal if you drank at a very young age, surprisingly it is still a big thing to boast about now in today's generation if you drink or smoke at a young age, the younger the age the bigger the man you are.

So it went on like that to the point I hurt my family in so many ways, my father and mother felt they failed to protect me from the world and my brothers were hard towards me to make me stop.

I took all that as a sign that they didn't love me, they did the best they could to toughen me up and break me from the binding spell that held me hostage in the temptations of the world, while all this stuffs happened, I moved out from my family at the age 16 and bunked in with some friends, thou all the tension between me and my brothers grew my parents remained neutral, and my sister always stuck by my side.

For a few weeks I stayed with my friends, their families were very welcoming and caring as always. I finally came home after my father constantly visited my friends place for me.  Things were calm when I returned, my parents both made sure the atmosphere at home was good enough for me to return, I went back to school finished year 11, and than 2017 came where I decided I didn't wanna attend school no more, because of the expectations I knew my followers had for me, I started becoming a problem again for my family, since I had a moment of fame that went too far up my head and this was my undoing, letting it go to my head !

I calmed down a bit when my dad got sick, I started caring again about my parents concerns, but it was a bit too late, my dad passed the same year on October 14 which I tattooed on my arm! I hated my dad for leaving too early, I also convinced myself I was the reason he passed away, most of my relatives told me to my face that I was the reason my father died and this broke me even more, my mother and siblings tried to hold on to what was left of me but I just kept falling deeper into my sadness, I took time out and went to stay at some trusted relatives place just so I can mend myself again but the pain was too much I thought about suicide so much at times, but then finally it hit me, my family are still here, my mother, my sister and my brothers, all of them still care and love me, and I didn't wanna hurt them anymore than I already did, so I went home after jumping from aunty to uncle to aunty trying to find peace and my father! Mind you it took me 2 years to get some peace from my dad’s passing.

 After 2 years of struggle and mountain I decided to go back to School and finish my education in high school so I can move on to tertiary and get a better job so I can care for my mother and siblings the way they did for me! I finished high school last year 2019-2020. Last year was also the hardest year in my 20 years of being alive on this earth, it was the year my mother passed away, my mom had been admitted to the hospital early October last year and I stayed with her in the hospital, skipped school,  sleeping on a wooden bench beside her bed, I even slept on the floor beside her bed. She got discharged from the hospital on the day of her 55th Birthday and we celebrated it at home with the whole family, after that we all agreed for her to stay at her sister’s place till she is fit enough to return since everyone at home was either working or still studying! 6th November 2020 we had a fundraiser dinner for a Youth Group I joined back in 2019, called Youths For Integrity.

That day I didn't go to school so I can go for practice, mom had come home for a visit,  that day we had a small argument about why I didn't go to school, I told her it was alright, it's just a one time thing, as always, after an argument we always sit and laugh at each other’s faces, and think of how stupid the argument was, everything was good between us, we had a relationship that is both weird and amazing, no matter how bad the exchange of words may be, we always sit together after that and just laugh, ask for forgiveness than eat a lot of food!

That same day we went to town, she got me a new phone and dealt with other family matters concerning all of us siblings, that day I told her to wait for me to get a job and I will buy her a big wardrobe and a new shelves and cabinets for her kitchen,

I told her I would be the first to take her abroad for vacation, anywhere she wanted to go, we parted ways in town, I went for practice and then I got ready for the fundraiser dinner for the YFI's that afternoon. Everything went well, we performed the final item, everyone was filled with energy after all the items, it was all joy and laughter.

I came up to my table to sit down next to my two best friends, Frances and Neville, and Neville turned to me and said my sister had been calling, I saw the amount of miss calls, I went ahead and called her back, as soon as she answered i heard someone crying, i knew instantly something was wrong, I begged her to tell me why were they crying, then after at least 7mins into the call, she told me in a low crying voice that mom had passed away and that none of us was there with her when she left; only the 3 men that took her to the hospital stood by her while the doctors tried to revive my mother. It broke my heart knowing the fact that she had to go without any of us around to send her on her way. I cried so much that same afternoon,  the fundraiser dinner had just come to its finale and all I can think about is my mother, I went up to the venue, grabbed my stuffs and my friends and wanted to leave asap, a few of the youths accompanied me, I didn't wanna tell them what happened, as I didn't wanna spoil their night, so we all exchanged goodbyes and I went on my way with my 3 friends Neville, Frances and Gayle dropping me off at the taxi area, I came home and cried alone in the house for hours, I remember sitting next to my cousin and my sister in law trying to hold back my tears while they thought I didn't know about moms passing, I also didn't wanna be the one to tell them that mom passed, we exchanged words and held in our tears, remained strong for each other!

We buried our mother after a few days and it was still the worst day of my life. I was had only a few weeks to prepare for my final exam for year 13. It was honestly a challenge, my mind and soul were not focused,  I tried my very best, I prayed about my exams, I missed my mom, and then with God’s Grace the results finally came out a few months later, it was a pass.

 It didn't get me a scholarship, but still I managed to pass, from that day till now, I have learned to put my complete trust in God, it was by God's grace I passed my exam, I decided to go back to Church - the Church I grew up in, and honestly going to Church everyday made me feel close to my mom, I could feel my mom’s presence and I felt Gods love.

 I have tried to commit whatever little spare time I have, to try and do God’s work, in return with the Hope's I get to change a life and save a soul! It is a testimony I will tell people all the time.

 I joined USP as a private student, my big brother in the village has managed to pay for my semester 1 fees while managing his family of 8, no scholarship means no allowance, yet surprisingly I manage to find my way to school and Church every week, even when we had almost nothing, my God is so amazing. He is truly a provider. I have witnessed it and I will always do my best to live by the Lord.

Mom’s siblings have stepped in to help us. Dad’s family have stepped in to help us, the Church has always been helping us till date, my friends have also been helping me so much lately - all this help I know for a sure fact is made possible by God’s Grace and the goodness in people!

I know I never really talked much about the YFI's, but know that I am grateful, because of them, I met a lot of beautiful souls.

My story has jumped from left to right, but I will say this still, life may give you mountains that looks impossible to overcome, trust that God will give you wings to fly and people around you will either be your boost over your mountains or they will be the anchor that keeps you held down.

Trust in God❤

Finally I want to leave you with a memory verse to Bless Your Life. I have found it very inspiring in my life's journey.

Jeremiah 29:11 - For I know the plans I have for you declares the lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.

 

I had to tell myself – "There's a light at the end of the tunnel, Hold on and Press On"

 by Sakeo Moce

Sakeo (l) pictured with colleagues

The beginning of the year 2021 has brought a mixed bundle of emotions, particularly with joy and sadness. Joy in the sense that Fiji has welcomed a new year with zero cases of COVID-19 community transmission and sad in the sense that Fiji was yet again devastated by tropical depressions and TC Ana which ravaged Fiji all at once in February 2021 just one month past category 5 TC Yasa which struck Fiji on the 18^th December 2020.

Fast forward to April 2021, just like other Fijians, I again felt a bit sad, disappointed, angry, anxious and depressed to learn that the invisible monster (virus) has successfully breached the different layers of protection that our nation has put right at the international border ever since March 2020.

I was having this emotion because as a Public Health professional, someone who is trained in Disease Prevention and Control, I understand clearly the impact of this breach and the implication of a confirmed case that has a travel history of attending a funeral with other 500 individuals before being detected under the existing Public Health COVID-19 surveillance radar. I knew that there would be restrictions and everyone would be forced to adapt to the new normal of wearing masks, practice social distancing and avoid unnecessary movements. I knew I would not be able to go to work and class as usual. I knew I would have to operate from home with minimum office resources and in a very homely environment. I knew I would not be able to go to church, meet friends and relatives. On top of this, I knew I would not be able to visit my parents and my siblings at Vatukoula until Fiji is COVID-19 contained. I also knew that there would be a lot of Fijians who will be also experiencing the same emotions and feelings I'm going through or perhaps even more extreme than I do and everyone would react and respond to it differently.

24^th May 2021, as I finally sat down and picked up my laptop to start typing and just breathe and reflect on my personal experiences during this COVID-19 pandemic, I noted that Fiji has now managed to go through at least one month of COVID-19 restriction. Staying at home seems to be normal again for me and was a bit boring again. Fortunately, I had a very good support group whom I interact with daily, either face to face or virtually. This support group is my friends whom I've now considered close friends because they are also professionals and they can also provide psychosocial support and our Talanoa forum is always considered a safe space. This combined with the support I got from calling the Lifeline Fiji just to anonymously engage in a confidential Talanoa with a Crisis Intervention Officer, reading the word of God, and praying has been a great coping mechanism for me to cope with the change in the environment. Each day, I have been reminded that nothing is ever permanent. 

Sakeo giving us the 'Wakanda' look! "Always be positive- There is a light at the end of the tunnel."

Things will get better and there's a light at the end of the tunnel. The more I think about it, the more I wanted to urge fellow Fijians to follow the instructions from the authorities especially from Dr. Fong, and am longing for everyone to be united and do our part to conquer this COVID-19 monster. The sooner we conquer it the sooner we will get back to normal. That will be the end of the tunnel for us all.

 

Insights on my First-Year Teaching Experience: Integrity in Serving Children

By Maria Yavala

My first year of teaching was quite a challenging experience, like being thrown down a steep cliff!  I eventually overcame those challenges. I am sharing this story in the hope that other youths can learn from it – that sometimes you embark on a new job and you feel so nervous. But afterwards, you realise that the fear was all in your mind and that praying and getting help from your peers and colleagues are important.

Being part of the Youths for Integrity has helped me to learn new skills in photography, health foods, film making. These experiences are meant to help you to be positive in dealing with challenging situations!

I had an interview at one of the private pre-schools here in Suva. This  was an inclusive school which meant that they also enrolled children with special needs. I asked them when they’d let us know of the successful applicant and they said they would make contact on Friday. Friday came and and I was disheartened that I didn't receive any phone call.

Weeks went by! I kept praying asking God to help me get a job so I could help out financially at home with my parents since I am the eldest of seven children. I had to make a difference and be a role model to my siblings.

As I was sitting watching my siblings go to catch the school bus, my phone rang.  It was from the pre-school where I had been interviewed. They asked if I could start right away.

Time came when I was  in front of the pre school gate. The school manager told me the class I would be taking and she also informed me that I would be assisting one of the teachers. There are 4 classrooms consist of sunshine babies from 0 -1 and there's the sunshine class consisting of 1 to 3 year olds and the paradise class aged 4 to 6. The star class had children with special needs.

So I was assigned to be in the paradise class as an assistant teacher helping an experienced teacher.

I witnessed how some children are still transitioning from home to school and it is hard for some as they tend to cry whenever their parents leave.

The routine of the school was simple; when the children arrive we give them some activities to keep them occupied and at 9.00am we start with our morning devotion and then some colourings to do at 10 o'clock and then their morning tea (recess). After that we do circle time in which we have sing-along followed by outdoor activities and then lunch. The half day children are taken to freshen up before their parents come to pick them up. The full day students have their shower and nap time around 3.00pm. They get ready to to have their afternoon tea and wait for their pick-up.

It was exciting for me to go to school seeing different multiracial students  and trying to win over their trust so they can be comfortable with me.

I was also asked to handle sunshine class (1-3) since I was under probation. The board wanted to see how I could handle them as well as changing diapers, potty training and socialising.

It has been a great learning experience.

I encourage our youths to have a positive attitude and to pray whenever they face challenges. Be sociable and learn to interact and learn from your colleagues.

Qalo – A New Breed of YFI Leaders

 Peni Qalo Lesianawai is a #YouthForIntegrity Leader. He presented on the Strategic Plan of Integrity Fiji at Ultiqa Palms in Feb (with Samu W). He has been actively involved in YFI TikToks and Films. Qalo’s favourite colours are green and white.  

Qalo says, “Everyone should be treated with respect and no one should make assumptions or stereotyped views just by looking at them.

Qalo also says that, “Young people’s views should also be respected. In iTaukei culture our elders are always right. But I believe that if we think there is a better way of doing something or if what they are saying is incorrect, we can give our views politely/diplomatically….rather than saying nothing and then gossiping later.

Qalo admits he is a straight talker: (he gives an example) “When I talk straight to people – I notice that some like it  but many don't. And they be like, ‘You talk too much.” I know what I'm doing and secondly when there is a meeting held and some friends don’t turn up and the next meeting they want to change everything that was discussed at the first meeting then I am honest with them. I tell them that they should have been on that earlier meeting. They be like showing rude faces to me. But when the story comes back to me it is totally different, they twist the story negatively.” !!! lol

Qalo attended Navakawau Catholic School, Holy Cross College, Ratu Navula College and Nasinu Muslim College. He enrolled at USP in 2020. doing Foundation in Chemistry and Biology. Then he switched to Bachelor of Arts (Psychology). 

Qalo is not in a relationship but loves to socialize.

Trust in the Lord to guide you …

Grace Konrote

It can be challenging when a baby is born during the pandemic period. For me it has been a huge learning experience. I appreciate that we all make mistakes. However, the most important thing is not to give in to depression but to move on in life trusting in the Lord to guide you.

As I hold Israel close to my heart I am encouraged by Psalm 143 Verses 7 and 8: “Come quickly, Lord, and answer me, for my depression deepens. Don’t turn away from me, or I will die. Let me hear of your unfailing love each morning, for I am trusting you. Show me where to walk, for I give myself to you.”

I know that eventually things will work out between two people. God is so good and I am so glad things are being worked out very constructively. In life one has to always trust in the Lord

What is challenging for me though is the Corona Virus is deadly and has killed millions of people around the world. This virus has stopped people from gathering together due to how quickly  it spreads. In Fiji, there has been many cases reported from the moment the first case was announced in 2020.

  As a young mom, it was a huge challenge for me during this difficult period of time because of the increasing cases that we had in my area (Makoi) and the strict orders imposed by the Ministry of Health. Since only essential work place are to be open, it was a bit hard for my family and i due to the increase in expenses because of having a baby and because of that, the risk of going out to buy essential stuffs for the family and my baby is a high priority since we're living within the red zone area.

  Despite all that I'm facing as a mom, my family and I manage to pull through during this difficult time and it also allows us to spend most of our time with each other as a family by enjoying each others company. We may have our ups and downs but as a family and with God's presence always in our lives, we always overcome such circumstances and continue to live our lives as best as we can with love.

I know that Israel Fonmanu is a strong baby and I and the family give him all the love that he deserves having been born in this extremely challenging pandemic time.

FINDING MY IDENTITY by Herleen Emily

I come from a very connected and healthy family where my dad is an indo-Fijian and my mum is kailoma (half-caste). Kailoma is another term for half-caste in I-taukei, which is used to categorize people with mixed ethnic background. 

Herleen with members of CEASEY

I am a proud product of inter-marriage but finding my true identity was a tough journey to battle. I have an indo-Fijian surname that I inherited from my father while my mother continues to follow her family surname that she received from her father. 

While growing up, I was always in a dilemma of whether to make an I-taukei or Indo-Fijian friends. It was never an easy decision, especially in school. If my friends were I-taukei they would eat, share and give me company during school hours however, when there was secrets being shared between friends, they would whisper, “Oh don’t tell her, she’s half Kaindia.” I would feel offended, is it because I have Indo-Fijian blood that makes people react this way? I would hate it when an I-taukei would call me “Gigi” or “bhaini” knowing the fact that I can converse in I-taukei.

I will not deny, I had quite a few indo-Fijian friends who would treat me like their own however, when we had conversations in Hindi, I would mispronounce and fumble few words like, “Ghora or Gorah” (Horse). They would make fun of me and say she has a “tehra baar” (frizzy hair). Frizzy hair is part of an identity for most of the Melanesian countries. Someone who is mixed with two dominant ethnicities, I was always in confusion and anger. Is it because I descend two cultures that make people react to me like that? Why am I treated like this?

There was a point where I wanted to befriend only people like me. Even though you belong to two ethnic groups, as an individual you are bound to face racism at every step of your life. My dad shared his philosophy that only you can find your true identity. Only you can know who you really are? It was not long that I recognized the advantage I was holding with me, I am a multilingual; I can speak three languages that most people do not have the capacity to do so. I have mixed features that make people curious to know who I really am. You can call me a hybrid or half caste but this who I am and I must not change myself for the sake of the society.

Soon after, I realized that the society I live in is pre-dominantly rooted in its strong ideologies that are hard to influence with modern day practices. Reading journal articles on inter-marriage, long ago people in the states were not allowed to marry someone outside their ethnic background and people who went against the laws were executed or murdered. However, today there is an increase in the number of inter-marriages in the world with people believing that beyond everything, love prevails. I find myself so fortunate that these laws were not practiced in the Pacific, especially Fiji where there is an abundance of different ethnic people. 

Herleen with mum and dad and brother Heral

Today, I stand tall and tell anyone who asks me, are you part? No dear, I am a hybrid, rich with two cultures and languages. You have something to say? I hope no, because I am a proud holder of the surname “Kumar” and at the same time proud to have a frizzy hair. This who I am! My identity is my soul and heart, not how I look like or how I speak. I am writing only a part of racial discrimination I faced in my life, there is more to unfold but if I keep digging the past, I am getting no good. This is a highlight of how people go through racism and it is hard to get out of it.

Today is International day of Racial Discrimination; do not let anyone discriminate you based on the ethnicity you belong to. Do not let them bully you, tell them race does not defines us humans but humanity does.